Monday, 27 May 2013

Chocolate and ice cream

                            Can't eat pork............Swine flu

                                    Can't eat chicken............Bird flu

                           Can't eat beef..............Mad cow

                                 Can't eat egg..............Salmonella

        Can't eat fish..........heavy metal toxic in their waters

Can't eat fruits and vegetable.............Insecticides and herbicides


     I believe that leaves CHOCOLATE & 
                ICE  CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!! 
          Remember 'STRESSED' 
            spelled backwards is 

              Send this to FOUR persons 
               and you will lose 2 pounds      

Delete it and you will gain 10 pounds

      That's why I had to send this to you, not 
                     wanting to take the risk,  
     And I wanted to put a smile on your face!!

Many thanks to Ron Lim for sharing
 this humorous mail. 
Alan CY Kok

Sunday, 26 May 2013

Anthropomorphic Nouns

The English language has some wonderfully anthropomorphic collective nouns for the various groups of animals, birds and other living things. We are all familiar with: 

A herd of cows
A flock of chickens
 A school of fish (or shoal)
 A gaggle of geese
However less widely known are: 
A murder of crows, 
that includes their distant cousins
 the rooks and the ravens. 
An exaltation of doves
A pride of lions 
Perhaps due to their wise and serious looks,
                    they're known as A Congress of Owls.
Now consider a group of noisiest, 
most obnoxious, most dangerous,
most aggressive and least intelligent 
of all primates-the baboons. 
And what is the proper collective noun for a group of baboons?
Believe it or not: A parliament of baboons!
The scene was copied in the making of the movie: Jumanji.
The baboons are carnivorous as shown in this picture.
You believe it or not? Some baboons were
                 caught and trained to handle machine guns!
                   And yet it was mentioned that they're 
                    the least intelligent of all primates. 
Here are some fine examples how human 
parliamentarians behave in their various
 countries. This one happened in South Korea.
The notorious Taiwanese Parliament in progress
                  where chairs flew, and punches exchanged.
 Mexican parliament.
Shut up your mouth! Italian parliament.
Take that from me-Get a taste of my slipper!
 you utter rascal! Indian parliament.

Take that! The poor Turkish parliamentarian 
received two blows at the same time. 
Relax, you're holding my neck. You want to strangle me? 
Prepare to taste my retaliation. Parliament in Ukraine. 
Comparatively the Indonesian parliament was so docile with 
little dramas when there were unsolved disputes.
 However there were shouts, fists blown into the air, 
and bad eggs thrown at the chair of the speaker. 

How about the arrogant, civilized, and one
who have evolved early into human race
but remains unrepentant over their war crimes
 during the WWII-The Japanese Parliament?

Very well-behaved indeed.

for reading.

Alan CY Kok
Many thanks to Jennifer Chiew for sharing.

Friday, 24 May 2013

Great pictures of graceful birds, lovely animals and enticing natural scenes

Wow, it is a fantastic, breathtaking, panoramic view from here,  man! 
Wish you  were  here with me!
 Die-hard plants struggle to emerge from the hard-surfaced 
tarmac to get some sunlight and water.
Make sure it ain't a piranha you're kissing. 

Moving rock in the desert.

Well, you birds change colors the way you want it?
Dandelion plant blocks the dazzling sun ray, 
the process paints a wonderful art piece.
 Comfortably seated on elephant tusks. 
Now who is bathing who?
Love is all around.
In fact it's inscribed on my fore-head.
Trouble brewing ahead. Don't go driving straight into it. 
It's a mushroom-shaped intimidating tornado taking shape.
Pink colored stork's beak is clearly made for catching fish.
A very handsome looking stallion.
Was there a supersonic flying jet spiraled its way 
into the sky just now, not too far from here?
 Butterfly? I don't see no butterfly. Oh... you 
mean that transparent winged insect?
Mmm........that's what friends are for; 
a little nudge here will make my day. 

Yellowish golden colored bird has good time indulging in wet, 
cooling bath in a fresh mountain stream.
A great show-off Peacock.
Hey, why did you peek on me?
Pretty, cute little baby giraffe born....where's Mom? 
Santa Claus was here. 

You ever heard of Love Island?

Those are the Arctic lights that dance across the sky in the North Pole.
Fish or flies with large eyes? Fish, of course they are.

Devastating volcano eruption in action. 
Molten lava flowing downhill to form a red hot steaming river. 

Sigh....... a scene that's worth a lifetime's journey to witness.
But for Christ's sake, don't shake your body too much. 
Nuclear bomb testing took place? 
No, it's just fanciful cloud formation.
Flower petals that look like humans wearing Mexican sombreros 
Horse-riding cowboys go through cold valley ground 
in midst of uneven landscape in their journey that takes days to complete.
The trespassed cold ground looks like a bird with wings wide-stretched in flight.

Brave black bird got a piggy ride from a predator hawk.
                   Will it cause you some inconvenience when you're 
                    out shopping or going down town to visit friends?

Many thanks to Ron Lim of LA, USA for sharing.  

Alan CY Kok